the tortuga papers

I said gangsta..

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 22:14:29 -0400

A bully (verbally) pushed me today, which is a bit of a pattern for this person. So I (verbally) pushed back. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

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ew ew ew...

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 08:32:40 -0400

I don't drive to work very often, but I did today since I am leaving for the farm immediately after work.

I park my car under a plum tree. It's nice because it's shaded, but bad because now there are plums dropping on my car and it's covered with sticky juice and I have to walk through dropped plums to get to said car. Ever step on a plum? A LOT of juice comes out.

But it gets worse....

In addition to the plums, I noticed today that there was a dead baby bird stuck to the roof of my car. I tried to get it off, but it was definitely stuck. Then I danced around in a circle saying "Ew, ew, ew!" but that didn't seem to help either. I only get up to about 35 mph driving to work, and that didn't dislodge it. If the 65 mph drive to my designated gassing up point doesn't get it off, I think I'll have to spring for a car wash.

Gross.

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hoo boy

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 22:12:03 -0400

So, if you don't want to hear about my menstrual cycle, just stop reading now.

As has happened in the past when I got an early period, for some reason the emotional effects are even worse than normal. (And I seriously am about two clicks away from asking for prozac because I get CRAZY with the PMS.) Anyhoo, I was minding my own business earlier this evening, sitting on the couch and watching 48 Hours Mystery, a show I am embarrassed to admit that I am obsessed with. (And if you watched tonights episode and want to discuss, well, you know how to find me.) A commercial for CBS' new show "Greatest American Dog" comes on ...

...and I promptly burst into fucking tears like a little bitch.

I also remembered the other FB status message that I wanted to write:

tortuga is a fucking catch.

That one comes courtesy of Skippy. He told me today that if I lived in his family's hometown, he would introduce me to his brother to date. I think, for a married man, that's a pretty high vote of confidence and compliment.

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current status

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 20:36:57 -0400

tortuga is....

too fucking old for this shit. The PMS is not helping.

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t-minus 5 hours, 20 minutes...

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 18:51:12 -0400

And then June 2008 will be over.

It wasn't the worse month of my life, not by a long shot. Those months involve either hospitals or the time post-law school when I went a little crazy or my former employer. But this one....was pretty bad. My dog died, my job became really shitty, people that I thought I could count on showed that I couldn't, a whole bunch of people that I never thought I'd speak to again showed back up, my parents' farm sustained a ton of damage in a storm...I mean, damn. And now, to top it off, I got my period 5 days early today with no warning cramping. And I was wearing light tan/white capris today! Like I needed one final "fuck you" from this month...

Some good things happened, though. I got myself re-centered for the first time since I came back from California. Just in time, too, because I'm going to need a strong backbone over the next few months. And I got to see Hoover Dam. And...yeah, that's about it. But it wasn't all bad - that's the important thing to note.

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QotD: Smiley Face

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 18:01:06 -0400

What's making you smile today?

NEW Discovery Channel Commericial - Boom De Yada!

and this.

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QotD: Friends Forever?

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 16:36:17 -0400

What would make you question a friendship?
Submitted by stueykins.

Oh, let's just say hypothetically, that my dog - whom I love more than anything else in the world - dies unexpectedly and someone that I thought was a friend didn't even say so much as "I'm sorry to hear that" and just sort of ignored the situation all together. And, further hypothetically, this person didn't seem to want to talk to me about anything at all related to my life for about two months and only wanted to talk about neutral news - political news, television news, etc. - when they brought it up and even ignored direct questions.

Yep. If, hypothetically, that situation would develop, I'd start to wonder what I did to make this person not like me anymore.

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looking forward to 2008 pt. 2

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 19:35:06 -0400

I was late for work this morning because I was tearing apart my apartment in search of my digital camera so that I could take a picture of myself to post on my blog. (Never did find the darn thing.) And then I had a bit of an existential crisis while trying to come up with 'interests' for my newly revamped LJ profile. Is it 2008? Am I 32 years old?

So, anyway, I was trying to take a picture of myself because, as readers of Ye Olde Blogge will remember, my goal two years ago when I joined Weight Watchers was to fit into those skirts I got during my first round of job interviews in 2005. (Got that? Do I need to draw a timeline?) Last year at this time I was able to sausage myself into them, but they were tight and unflattering. Well, guess what? I wore one today to work and it's actually - well, I don't want to say loose, but there was no VPL or anything like that. There was room between the skirt and my thighs/belly/ass. So yay.

See, here's the thing about these skirts...and unless you're a fat girl, I'm not sure that you're going to understand it. There's nothing fancy about them. They're A-line linen skirts that I got at Target for, like, $15 or something. What makes them special to me, however, is that I got them from the "normal sized people" section. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't hate myself or the way I look...I hate clothing manufacturers and their insistence upon making ugly clothes for fat people. And now that I can fit in "normal sized people" clothes, a whole new world of shopping possibilities is open to me. Of course, now I need a new fitness goal....

I think I figured out why I am so gun-ho about LJ and getting involved there this week. (And as we all know, there's nothing I like more than navel gazing and figuring out my thoughts about something...) Anyhoo, as part of my Web 2.0 crap that I do for work, I've been hitting Twitter pretty hard. If you haven't tried it, I highly recommend it. (I think it's why I don't change my FB status as much anymore or post here.) It's really made me miss the conversational aspects of the Internet that I used to have back when I was so into message boards. I don't know what happened, but I just slowly stopped posting places and entered into lurkerdom. Well, it's time to break out of that, methinks.

My professions big conference is coming up next month which means having to network and dealing with possible awkward situations. I've been really dreading it, to the point of having stomach pain when I thought of it. But, on Tuesday I had a long conversation with a co-worker* in which I gave him the 411 on everything and he's promised to be my wingman and help me get through it. I feel a lot better about everything ever since.

*I don't talk much about work or co-workers for obvious reasons, but I do want to talk about this co-worker....let's call him "Skippy." (That's sort of my mental nickname for him.) I love him to death. He's like the little brother I asked Santa for every year. He sort of reminds me of my dad and apparently, I remind him a lot of his mother. So basically we use each other to work out our family issues. And lest you get the wrong idea, he is a married man and even if I didn't consider a wedding ring to put someone in the "permanently unavailable" category, I am so unattracted to him, it's not even funny. Seriously, the thought of having sex with him makes me want to vomit. I just can't even picture it. But we just get each other and it's so great to have this new partner in crime. And as I told the TL last night...married men? Are even better than gay boyfriends when it comes to giving advice on male issues.

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time wasting 101

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:12:22 -0400

I spent about an hour of work time today editing my livejournal profile and adding LJ's I like to read...and I don't even keep a blog there. Go me.

I do, however, think that I'm going to start to try and get involved over there more, like community wise and stuff. I just...need to change things up a little. I'm still going to blog here. Just try to get an Internet Posse like I used to have back in the days of my heavy Fametracker and TWoP use.

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Life QotW: This Week in Life...

nobody@vox.com(tortuga) — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 10:48:34 -0400

What would you like to accomplish this week?

I'd like to write a to-do list for work, which I've been trying to do for two weeks.

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