February 1, 2008 marks the 20 year anniversary of me getting my first period. TWENTY YEARS! That seems like such a long time! I feel like I should do something to celebrate....
...Red Velvet cake, maybe?
Here is what another blogger thinks about Hillary Clinton, which sort of follows my thoughts about her.
Okay, y'all, I made up my mind and I'm going to San Francisco. If you got any sightseeing ideas, let me know.
Perhaps not coincidentally, after I told my mom about my plans, we had the following exchange while walking across a parking lot.
Mom: Is that how you walk to work?
tortuga: What?
Mom: Is that how you walk?
tortuga: Um, I guess so, why?
Mom: Well, I feel better. No one's going to mess with you.
tortuga: Huh?
Mom: Your walk.
tortuga: What about it?
Mom: Well, it's not exactly dyke-like....you just walk very confidently. Well, I guess it's sort of butch, but don't worry, it's still feminine.
tortuga: Oh. Thanks. I think.
I am returned from my weekend at the farm.
My mom didn't really have a good reason why she joined Facebook. Given the line of questioning I got during the weekend, I'm guessing she thought she'd get a clue as to whom my "secret significant other" other is. ::insert hysterical laughter here:::
Dad and I went for a walk in the woods with the wonder dog today. We came upon a dead deer. Its abdomen and a leg were pretty chewed up, but otherwise it was fine. I said - not really in jest, but more in a committee meeting brainstorming mode - "You know, we should cut its head off and take it to a taxidermist to have it mounted."
Dad mumbled something that sounded agreeable but non-committal and we continued on our walk. We got back to the house and Dad said, "Well, I'll go get the chainsaw and we'll go get that deer head." I just stared at him and tried to come up with a reason why we shouldn't. "Wha...I...brainstorming...okay, fuck it, let's do this thing."
I mean, it WAS a 14 point buck, after all.
So, about 15 minutes later I was holding onto the rack of a dead deer while my dad diligently tried to cut its head off. We decided against the chainsaw (that would have been too messy) and opted instead for a garden nippers. Yes, garden nippers. In case you're wondering, that didn't work well. At all. We had to twist the head around and around to get the skin thick enough to make the cutting mechanism of the nippers effective. And it was really hard to keep the head whipping around If I were to do it again - and let's face it, I just might - I would probably use a utility knife.
We returned victorious to the house, dead deer head in tow. By this time the Voice of Reason (aka Mom) decided to make an appearance. "Did you find an arrow in it?" "No." "A gun shot wound" "No." "Any sign of how it might have been killed besides rabies or wasting disease or something else that could kill you two jackasses?" "Um, that would be a negatory, Mom." "When you start foaming at the mouth, don't come crying to me." At that, she went back inside.
So, of course, after that Dad and I had to take pictures of ourselves with the deer head. I think I like my set best, because the first picture is of me holding the deer head (which has about 3 inches of fur-covered neck and about another 4 inches of spinal column and muscle hanging out of the bottom.) Picture two is of me, deer head, and the dog, who is sniffing at the deer head. In picture three, is Sophie with a good mouthful of dead deer and me trying to hold onto the head. Picture four is us engaged in a full on tug-o-war.
I think I know what's going in the Christmas cards next year!
My mom just friended me on Facebook.
I did not set up this account for her.
The birthday and e-mail are right, so it must be her.
I have no idea what the fuck is going on.
I'm going home this weekend. It's going to be a long one, I fear.
Hello non-Americans. This is how we pick the person to run the most powerful country in the world.
The screwy-ness of the world is all starting to makes sense now, right?
Gentle Reader,
I am going to take a vacation the first week of April. I'm doing a conference presentation on March 28 which I am already freaking out about and this is going to be my reward. This will also fulfill my New Years Resolution to go somewhere I've never gone before.
Should I go to:
(a) New York City
(b) San Francisco
(c) Other. Please describe.
Money's an object, of course, but I do have some savings and my teaching money to use. And I've become comfortable using my credit card. And I'm really good at traveling cheap, so suggest away. The only place I absolutely will not consider is Australia because (a) I'm only going for a week and (b) even if I weren't, I don't know that I'll ever be able to hack the five day flight or whatever it is.
Thank you,
tortuga
Come on...you know he's thinking about doing it.
I thought about it a lot over the weekend, and I realized that I'm really bothered by the fact that the first woman president might be someone who rose to prominence because of her husband. Hillary Clinton is a very smart woman, but if she had married someone else, she'd still most likely be a partner at a law firm, maybe doing a little adjunct teaching on the side. The corporate board memberships, the health care reform gig, everything really...all because of Bill.
Check it, yo: Someone made a lego Stephen Hawking.
In all honesty, this isn't a full on peanut butter cups alert. I dig legos, I dig smart scientists, but Stephen Hawking is actually kind of an ass that gets a pass on a lot of stuff because (a) he's a genius and (b) he has ALS. If it were a lego Linus Pauling (complete with lego vitamin C pills!), I would probably wet myself out of joy.
